A Hindi Blog by Gaurav Garg

1. Sign on a railway station at Patna : (Aana free, jaana free, pakde gaye to khaana free). 2. Sign on a famous beauty parlor in Mumbai : (Don't whistle at the girl going out from here. She may be your grandmother). 3. Sign on a bulletin board : (Success is relative, More the success, More the relatives). 4. Sign at a barber's saloon in Juhu, Mumbai : (We need your heads to run our business). 5. A traffic slogan : (Don't let your kids drive if they are not old enough or else they will never be old). 6. THE BEST ONE BY INDIAN ARMED FORCES : (It's God's responsibility to forgive the terrorist organizations. It's our responsibility to arrange the meeting between them.

A coffin maker was on his way to deliver one of his coffins one night when his car broke down. Trying not to be late, he put the coffin on his head and began heading to his destination. Some policemen saw him and wanted to make some easy money off him (bribe) so they challenged him "Hey, what are you carrying and where are you going"? The man replied (You will love the answer) . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "I did not like where I was buried so I am relocating" . . . . . . . . The policemen Fainted..!

हिंदी के अध्यापक मिश्रा जी सायकल की दुकान पे हवा डलाने पहुँचे???? मिश्रा जी~ लो भाई!!! अगले चके में हवा डाल दो. थोड़ी कम है??? दुकानदार~ मास्साब!!! आप तो हिंदी के टीचर हो जरा शुद्ध हिंदी में बताओ तो जाने के आप हमारे बच्चों को कितना अच्छे से हिंदी पढ़ाते हो. मिश्राजी~ प्रथम तो ये,क़ि मुझे शिक्षक उदबोधित् कीजिये टीचर नहीं 😒😒 अब हे!!  कनस्तरनुमा लौह~गुमठि में विराजमान द्विचक्र~वाहिनी सुधारक, मेरी द्विचक्र~वाहिनी के अग्रिम चक्र से कुछ वायु निगमन कर गयी है, कृप्या अपने वायु~चूषण यंत्र से अग्रिम चक्र में थोड़ी वायु प्रविष्ट करने की कृपा करें, ताकि मैं नियत समय पर पहुँच कर, आप जैसे मूढ़मति पिता के ज्ञानरिक्त मस्तिष्क लिये बैठे पुत्रों के मस्तिष्क में ज्ञान की प्रविष्टि करने की अपनी दैनिक क्रिया को पूर्ण कर सकूँ??? ?????????? समझे!!!!! दुकानदार बेहोश!!!!!........../// Handmate POR 052

भरी अदालत के मुकदमा जीतने के बाद जज साहब ने बुजुर्ग को बधाई देते हुए कहा :- बाबा आप केस जीत गए । बुजुर्ग किसान ने कहा :- राम तनै . . इतनी तरक्की दे के तू "दरोगा" बण जाए । वकील बोले, "रे ताऊ "जज" तो "दरोगा" तै बहुत बड़ा होए हैं। बुजुर्ग बोले, ना रै..... मेरी नज़र में तो दरोगा ही बडा हैं पेशकार (वकील):- बोले वो कैसे ? बुजुर्ग - इस जज ने मुकदमा खत्म करण मे "दस साल" लगा दिये जबकि "दरोगा जी" शुरू में ही कहा था "पांच हजार रुपया दे दयो.....  दो दिन मे मामला रफा दफा कर दूगा।...

While walking with a 5year old son, he picked  something  of the ground and started to put it in his mouth . His mother took the item away from him & asked him not to do that . 'Why' ? He asked . 'Because it's been on the ground ; you don't know where it's been. It's dirty & probably has germs' , she replied . He looked at her with total admiration and asked , 'Mum , how do you know all this stuff ? You are so smart..' Thinking quickly she replied , 'All mums know this stuff. It's on the Mum Test . You have to know it , or they don't let you be a Mum'. They walked along in silence for a few minutes , but he was evidently pondering this new information. 'Oh....I get it' ! he beamed , 'So if you don't pass the test you have to be the dad'. 'Exactly' , she replied with a big smile on her .